So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Randomize