At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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