oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
