every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
