Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
They are going to name an STD after you.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
