O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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