OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
