my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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