It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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