This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
