ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
