Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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