Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So many bounce houses so little time
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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