Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Houston, we have a squirter
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
