She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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