...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
