Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize