direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize