Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
