I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
