Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
