no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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