i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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