To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Randomize
