Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
