DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
