Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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