She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
