the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
