Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
