is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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