He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
COCAINE IS GR8
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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