Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
