I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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