so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
