and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
