Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
