Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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