I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
