Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
