I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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