When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
