i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
