i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
