Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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