I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
