so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
