ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
