just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
