Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
