is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My vagina is officially offended.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
